CFS/ME; it used to be so misunderstood that people were basically told they had a dibilitating condition for which there were was no cure and they would have it for life.
Over the last few years things have begun to change and now there are a plethora of ways to look at and tackle being ill. Lots of research is being carried out and from what I can see there is no one answer that fits all.
From early on in my diagnosis a friend who had ME told me that if you get onto it early there is a high chance of making a full recovery. ” Well”, thought I, “that’s the route I’m taking.”
Having met a complete dead end with the medical profession who basically said I was on my own, I set about seeing what was out there. I tried joining a few forums but I think the honest answer is I’m not really a forum sort of person, they didn’t suite me.
Somehow I came across the OHC (Optimum Health Clinic) and I immediately liked the fact that it was set up by people who had fully recovered.
After trying on my own, to work through the on-line stuff they have, I’ve decided to sign-up for telephone treatment. Since I am still under the care of my nutritionist in Edinburgh I am sticking with the psychology side of their programme for now.
I know there are people diagnosed with CFS/ME who won’t have any truck with the idea of there being a psychological component to it, I happen to feel differently. I don’t believe it was all psychological since I have had digestive and other health issues for years, but couple them to some very unhelpful ways of operating in the world and I can see why I finally burnt out, and my body brought me to a standstill.
It seems the route to this being haulted in ones tracks differs from person to person, for some it may be purely physical perhaps a virus or pollutants, more than their system could cope with but for me the connection to long practiced patterns of thinking and behaving rings too many bells for me to ignore it any more.
This is an important journey for me. I am taking on change on a scale and magnitude different to anything I’ve done before and I’ve done a lot. Perhaps it’s because of what’s gone before that I feel able to tackle this now, I don’t know and actually I don’t care. I just want to get well and I am willing to do what I have to.
A lot of the information and material is already known to me but this time I have to do the work. I don’t know if you have been like me, I’ve had two ways of tackling change before:
1. Read the book skipping over the bits at the end of the chapter that require action. I’ve told myself, ” I will, but later, I’ll just read on a little more and then I’ll do the work”. Of course I did not go back, I just ticked another book off the list of read that, convincing myself that I had also done that.
2. Decide to acutally DO the work and start off enthusiastically but fairly quickly fall into mode 1.
Well, NOW is my LATER, now is the time for my transformation.
I intend to share as best I can what happens on this path I have chosen; perhaps I want a record, perhaps I hope to help or inspire others, who knows , this is just where I find myself now.
I’m putting my best foot forward, anyone coming?